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When things feel hopeless, here are a few stories to remind you of your capacity for grace, gratitude, and revolutionary self-love this Thanksgiving season.  I have a short list of favorite stories that have helped me rise to the challenge, overcome fears of circumstances out of my control, and see differently in a sea of uncomfortable differences. Stories that have offered me powerful clarity to shift my narrow viewpoints and expand through discomfort.
Wahe Guru! That feeling of ecstatic bliss going from darkness to light, ignorance to wisdom. Aha! Ahhhhh….. Ha!! (Relax and smile!) As I think about the things I’m grateful for this season, this is a big one: stories. Stories that light you up and stories of impact, especially when the impact can change the drudgery and anxieties of everyday life into something deeply touching and hopeful. Of course there are many Inspiring and incredible stories of perseverance, courage, struggle, and overcoming the odds— and these are powerful! But today I am thankful for those tales and takeaways that gift us support and guidance through daily challenges, ordinary circumstances, general stressors, and simply how to be in this diverse and crazy world with others and with yourself. These stories are absolute gems. Let me share a few of my favorites with you. In honor of these creators, I will offer links to their books or websites so that you can ‘meet’ them directly and support their work, if you wish. These are not sponsored, simply my deepest admiration and gratitude for their impact. I’m sharing my takeaways and how I found them to be so important. In most cases, the depth, power and synopsis of the stories are much more than what I’ve written. I hope you will read the full tales and discover for yourself. May you find them worthy and helpful in your life, as much as they have touched mine. In no particular order: See No Stranger: A Memoir and Manifesto of Revolutionary Love by Valarie Kaur One of the first books I included in my book club, this book contains those heroic and inspiring stories that make you believe in the goodness in humanity. Stories of forgiveness in circumstances that seem unforgivable….and how it can offer the perpetrator an opportunity to completely change 180 degrees, from what they believed to be true. How deeply that opening can heal not only the forgiven but the forgiver. The key gift I took from the book is in its title: See No Stranger. If we can see “strangers” as family, as the author suggests, instead of some unknown entity, we are more inclined to create an opening for “the other” to share who they are. We are more inclined to be curious about this relation. We can discover we are all in the family of this human race, on this earth, at this time together. We are more alike in our hopes and dreams, fears and blocks, and feelings than we think. “You are the part of me I do not yet know,” Ms. Kaur muses. When we are so bothered by someone else’s beliefs or actions, what is that part of us that is so disturbed? Not everyone feels the same way so what is it within you that needs examining? How can we wonder about ‘the other’ as “...the part of me I do not yet know”? How can we see ‘the other’ as family, not a stranger at all? What Happened To You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing By Bruce D. Perry, M.D., Ph.D. and Oprah Winfrey This is a collection of stories that showcase how our life experiences subconsciously shape who we are and how we respond. Responses or reactions that don’t make sense on the surface but, digging into what happened to that person--what is their story?—and their (mis-)behaviors make perfect sense. This book reminds me to consider “what happened to [that person]?” instead of thinking “what’s wrong with [them]?” “What happened to you” leaves space for empathy, for listening, for creating connection. When people react seemingly out of context, I wonder “what happened to them?” I can’t always get that answer, which is often buried deep in one’s subconscious even they don’t know why they are triggered. I can however create space for the possibility that something happened, even as I may never get to know. I can set my own boundaries (if their subconscious reaction might cross a line for me), and then trust and let go. I can choose to believe– as I once heard Brené Brown say: “What if everyone is doing the best they can?” It’s not OUR best, it’s THEIR best, based on where they are today and what they know or don’t know. Same applies to ourselves. Zen Shorts by Jon J Muth This children’s book is an excellent one for adults of all ages. I’ll focus on two of its tales. Its Buddhist messages are simple yet profound and seem to apply to so much of the social dynamics we encounter every day. First, The Farmer’s Luck or as I like to call it: the “maybe” story. The tale moves through unexpected outcomes that the people quickly judge as lucky or unlucky, only to stand corrected. It reminds me that no matter the situation that’s happening in the world, there’s no telling for sure if “my vote” is the best way. Best way for whom anyway? We don’t know for certain even when we feel so certain. Thus, don’t get worked up when things don’t go your way. Just maybe, that “unlucky” situation happened exactly so a subsequent “lucky” situation can happen…….maybe!! I’ve noticed so many of us digging our heels in for our beliefs and what we think is “the right way” or “the better of two evils”. The truth is……maybe! We are allowed our beliefs certainly and we can take actions that align and support “our truth”, but then, let go of the outcome or the angst over someone else’s alternate reality. You don’t know where they’ve been, what they’ve experienced, what they know and don’t know. And they can feel the same of you. The truth is…..maybe. Second, A Heavy Load is a tale of a wise older monk and an apprentice who run into an obnoxious and rude lady on their walk. Quite simply it teaches us the wisdom of “letting go” of things that don’t really matter. Yes, the situation was “wrong”, the person was unreasonable and annoying, and they dealt with it and kept going. Physically, the situation was over. Mentally, was it over or did you continue to carry the heavy burden? How many times do you find yourself replaying an experience that is over and out of your hands? Instead you carry the weight of judgment, rumination and anger, even after you’ve dealt with what was in your control? Does it serve you to keep dwelling on it? “Why are you still carrying it?” Tattoos on the Heart: The Power of Boundless Compassion by Gregory Boyle In this book, the author shares the intense stories of the gang members he offers his services to, helping them to find a path, self-worth, kindness and support. Truly heartbreaking and elevating stories of fellow humans surviving through tough circumstances and environments. These stories reminded me how our lives can change so meaningfully with even the smallest shift in connection, trust and faith– and that it’s never too late to receive that shift. Going from believing you are worthless and stuck in a life sentence to discovering you have support available to you, innate capacities and value can change not only your future outlook, but also your haunting low-image of your past self. Your much-improved future You develops a much-improved version of the past You. As I reflect back on my personal experience with low self-esteem, it is remarkable how completely that shift into self-love was able to change my long-held, negative self-assessment of the past. This is one of the reasons I always tell people it’s never too late to change your self-worth. It changes more than your present and future; it also elevates your past. The Little Soul and The Sun: A Children’s Parable by Donald Neale Walsch A children’s parable and another one that is powerful for adults, the author shares the tale of a sweet soul conversing with God. This soul wishes to learn what certain attributes actually feel like, such as forgiveness. We learn that we are all souls who get to live as humans in order to experience “light” and that some souls –our friends and fellow light beings– get to be the “dark” so that the “light” can be felt. The story offers a beautiful reminder that we are all innocent and light at our soul level; we just need to remember this as we encounter those souls who are playing “dark” so that our light can shine. In the world today, as we encounter “dark” others or situations, it can feel scary, frustrating, maddening, unfair and hopeless. I find it helpful to think of this story and the darkness that simply allows us to let our light shine. It seems the darker things get, the more we see courageous, forgiving, creative, graceful, generous, [insert your own “light” quality] heroes showing up in the world. There’s truth to this. I think of the Darth Vader-Luke Skywalker scene in Star Wars where Luke insists on the goodness underneath the “darkness” of his father, refuses to fight him, and through his courageous showing of love, draws out the light in Vader. Yet another story that conjures up this reminder of light shining on the dark..... .....of love answering fear’s call. A Thanksgiving Invitation for Stories If you’ve taken classes or coaching sessions with me, you’ve likely heard me reference one or more of these stories. They are currently my most meaningful stories I like to share. I have a handful of stories from “The Moth” podcast I also find deeply healing and elevating. And the list keeps growing. As we enter the holiday season, I invite you to share some of your favorite, impactful stories and ask others’ for theirs. Ask: are there any tales you’ve heard or read lately that moved you, elevated your life somehow, created a shift in perspective or outlook? Stories you are grateful for? Stories are a bridge or path to your next becoming. They are healing and a powerful way to internalize valuable lessons for growth and empowerment. And it’s so much fun to hear a good story. I wish you all of that and more. Please feel free to share the brilliant works I shared from my short list. I hope they spread more elevation, love and hope in the world. Happy Thanksgiving, friends! With grace, Anna SachKiret PS. Do you have your own short list of tales you’d like to share? Please share it with me, along with the impact it had on you! PSS. Speaking of sharing, every quarter Savitree Kaur and I host a live, online check-in to connect with you within community. We would love for you to join us for our next one, celebrating the Winter Solstice. More info to come– meanwhile, save the date/time of Saturday, December 21 at 10:00 AM central time.
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 When something traumatic happens in life, when we’re burdened by challenging emotions, when life seems to take a wrong turn, it can be confusing and set you up for despair. It’s in these moments we can find ourselves searching for answers.
Why did this happen? What could I have done differently? How can I process this? Is this a sign, a message from the Universe? What now? In the shock of trauma or change, I find it comforting to lean on gratitude. What am I grateful for? I know I am so blessed, and breathing life into this feeling can ease the pain and confusion. Tonight, I sought inspiration from one of my favorite poets– Rumi –and his poem The Guest House. It reminds me that every moment, every feeling, every challenge is a guest and guide to be cherished, no matter how they show up. The Guest House By Jalaluddin Rumi, 13th-century Persian Sufi mystic, poet and theologian -from The Essential Rumi, translated by Coleman Barks This being human is a guest house. Every morning a new arrival. A joy, a depression, a meanness, some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor. Welcome and entertain them all! Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows, who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture, still, treat each guest honorably. He may be clearing you out for some new delight. The dark thought, the shame, the malice, meet them at the door laughing and invite them in. Be grateful for whoever comes, because each has been sent as a guide from beyond. --RUMI Meet them at the door laughing. Indeed. And with great curiosity and wonder! I am truly grateful for this poetic reminder and inspiration for this life. It is grand and mysterious! And I am grateful for every guest. How does this poem land for you? Did you need to hear this today? With much grace and love, Anna SachKiret PS. A coming series? Speaking of poetic powerhouses, mantra meditation is one of the most powerful and comforting ways to code over negative thought patterns in your brain and create new, elevating thoughts to support and enhance your life. And they are so beautiful to listen to and to chant. I’m considering creating a separate series of posts to share mantra chants with you all. Is this something you’d be interested in? Please let me know!  In a YouTube Shorts video posted by Screenwriter, Consultant and Film Producer Slavica Bogdanov, she instructs you to raise your arms and jump up and down and exclaim, "I got it, I got it, I got it, I got it, I got what I wanted......!!!!" Just do that simple, if silly, action when you’re feeling small and afraid. and you will quickly feel pumped up, more motivated, energized and filled with positivity. I played along and tried it, and guess what? It worked! It felt so incredibly good! So simple yet so powerful. Little hacks like this to make your emotional life easier speaks volumes to me. How about for you? Decision Hack in a Hat One hack that I often share is the "how to decide" hack. If you're having difficulty choosing between things, write down your options on little slips of paper, fold the papers and throw them in a hat (or any container really). Blindly choose one and be prepared to notice your response. Open the slip of paper and..... you'll know. You'll know if you didn't actually want that. You'll know if you got the one you wanted and, hey, this just confirmed it! You'll feel it in your body. Instantly. Most of the time, if not all the time, WE KNOW what we want but something is blocking us from claiming that desire. Doing this hack is a way to start reconnecting with that inner wisdom. Eventually you'll start to believe in yourself and not have to go through the hack. In any case, other than possibly the time and paper to do the exercise, it doesn't hurt and can really help you to gain clarity and awareness. You're there already; remove the block. Don't stop there, by the way. When you notice your response to having chosen one that you didn't want or one that you did, stop to ask yourself: what was the block? What stopped you from "knowing" outright? What beliefs, influences, judgments or resistance attached themselves to the decision, to each option? This is a great exercise to develop deeper self-awareness on how you tick. We all have life experiences that shape our subconscious thoughts. The more you shine a light on these hidden inner messages, the more you can stop them from holding you back from the life you were meant to live. Here’s my own example of working the hack: “my next step indecision”. I needed to decide on the next level of support and coaching that would help me move the needle in my business. Faced with four excellent options with varied focuses, I wanted to do all of them but that would not be time- or money-efficient. Plus it would be overwhelming thus ineffective. Decision-in-a-Hat Hack: after placing the 4 slips of paper in a hat, I prepared to notice my responses.
Looking at your obstacles is not fun.
Once illuminated, you may realize there's a reason that block was hidden. With regret, you might wonder: can I put it back now? Out of sight, out of mind? In actuality, you probably can stuff it back down with a bit of self-sabotage and the usual self-soothing techniques….but do you really want to? These subconscious blocks that rendered you paralyzed-to-decide become thicker and taller walls in your life, brick by brick. You loosened one block. You can decide to knock it out completely and let the light in... which can then reflect out through your expressions. You have a gift that wants to shine, but it's stuck behind this wall. Do you know what IS fun? Getting to shine. Making decisions with more ease that move you forward in your journey. Discovering who you are when you are allowed to be. This is moving from fear to love. Whether you seek help from a trusted coach, mentor, therapist, or friend, or seek to figure it out on your own (--although having some form of support system is always recommended), decide to clear the block. And then the next one and the next. It'll surprise you how easy it is to face that next old emotional block once you've experienced the freedom from clearing the first. You'll realize you can do hard things and a proportionate --and often exponential-- measure of JOY will follow. Each time you do this, you can truly cheer for yourself: I did it, I did it!! (Or I got it!!!!) Because you did. Cheering for you with awe, Anna SachKiret PS. Tell me: what bricks have you removed (or started to remove) that you love to share about? Also, what's a favorite hack of yours to help you through an emotional challenge? (This post was originally published on January 27, 2022 and re-titled+updated on October 2, 2024). Check out the free event invitation in the post-scrript!  @Kamchatka via Canva.com When I think about the decisions I've made in my life, there are some that bring me joy and pride and others that make me think 'what on earth was I thinking'?!? I can now reflect on those latter ones and realize I WAS, in fact, THINKING --and not feeling. How often do we know deep down what we are meant to do yet we ignore those inner messages for our brain's more logical-seeming demands? We don't want to be looked upon as irrational or --gasp-- emotional! No, do what people expect and can make sense of. Right. That's what your ego keeps saying.
To be clear, I wouldn't change a thing about these past decisions because I know they were the lessons I needed at the time.....AND at present. To be able to reflect back on those experiences and how my decisions shaped my life, I can honor those lessons today. Today I'm in a space where I can listen self-compassionately and understand the hard messages, know how it has shaped my values and beliefs--- and make better decisions going-forward that support and develop a more elevated experience, a more true-to-me experience, an evolved experience, a purposeful, life-fulfilling experience. In other words: Joy. Peace. Freedom To get to where I am today, I had to look deeply at those feelings I ignored or stuffed down or escaped from through whatever self-sabotaging means I could. It's scary to start such an endeavor-- but it's so worth it! Clearing old feelings by meeting them stops them from haunting you further. It frees you from the subconscious reactions, responses, and personality malfunctions that make you wonder, 'why did I do or say that?'. Instead you stand tall, get clear, and feel assured in your ability to meet all challenges (even emotional ones) and are able to create a life you were born to love. Nowadays, I'm looking for: Deeper connections with the world– physically and spiritually. More opportunities to fail and grow. More fresh takes on life. More gratitudes. More openness. More healing energies. More fun. A shift out of 'the way things have always been done' into a more free and loving world that aligns with me. I can choose this life that I desire, making new decisions that inspire and uplift and hold me in my Truth. I can listen to and talk with my emotions safely because I know clearly that they are the voice of my soul, guiding me and crying out to protect me. I need only pause, breathe, and quiet the noise to hear.......and then decide. What do you desire these days? What has your emotional guides been telling you? How did you decide for you? Peace and wisdom, Anna SachKiret P.S. Join me THIS FRIDAY 10/4/2024 at Noon CT for a live online, complimentary session on the true purpose of our emotions and how they guide you. Register in advance. I hope to see you there!  If you feel angry, divided and confused, do your inner work.
If you feel scared, uncertain and unsettled, do your inner work. If you question your worth, do your inner work. If you can’t stop judging others, do your inner work. If you feel envy or victimized, do your inner work. If you don’t know what you want in life, do your inner work. It all starts here. Inside you. With grace, Anna SachKiret PS. Join me and Savitree Kaur (@Decision Confidence) for a free online celebration to experience some inner work practices in honor of the autumn transition: The Fall Equinox 2024, on Sunday 9/22/2024 at 10am CT (60 minutes). Message me for details or simply register here to attend. “Jack of all trades” turned “Jack of all trades, master of none” then “Jack of all trades, master of none, but oftentimes better than a master of one” offers a shifty proverb to reflect upon when we consider our own sense of mastery in life. What started off as a positive description of one who is versatile and has a broad range of knowledge, the adage skewed into a negative opinion of someone who isn’t a master at anything, and then changed again to reclaim some of the merits of having more skill than just one trade. I’d like to change all of this to simply: “Jack of all trades and master of Me”.
So I celebrate the jack of all trades. AND, to both the jack and the single-master, I do suggest a special kind of mastery to support the understanding of interconnectedness and the whole. That is: the mastery of Self.
As is the micro, so is the macro. And vice versa. Master your Self and the world gains mastery. What is self-mastery? What does it look like? What it isn’t: perfection, always put-together, all-knowing What it IS: self-awareness, compassion, strength to look at one’s flaws & challenges, courage to make change, active reflection & realignment, equanimity to maneuver the ups & downs within and socially, deep gratitude and self-love. It is a conscious work-in-progress. Self-Mastery can involve many aspects of Self and yet the work of self-mastery can boil down to these key elements:
More on these later. Deep-Dive, not Shallow Yoga teaches us that deep breathing can counteract stress. By activating the parasympathetic nervous system, we can calm our mind and body. This allows us to face challenges with more clarity and make better decisions. Thus, we can both breathe deep and dive deep to gain mastery over who we are and how we live. To master ourselves, we delve into both our physical and emotional well-being. Addressing these areas can then positively impact other areas of well-being, including your spiritual and relational health. It can’t not! Let's start at the surface. This might involve exercise, nutrition, therapy, or spiritual guidance. To know where to begin, check-in…. Begin by asking yourself: 'What's bugging me?' and 'How much is it a problem for me?' This can help you identify areas of concern in your body, your situations, and state of being; and then decide on next steps. This is the simplistic version. The complexity comes in as you dig deeper. For example, if you're bothered by having woken up tired again, despite enough sleep, it might indicate underlying issues. It could lead to missed opportunities, self-doubt, and decreased motivation. These feelings can impact your entire day and even lead to despair and disconnection. Underneath the doubt and despair may be further emotions that need to be cleared, that stem from some childhood experience, and so on. As you dive deeper, the temptation to distract ourselves or self-medicate is strong. Fears of discomfort or unknowns can surface. This is where a 'jack of all trades' might find refuge by jumping to another area rather than diving into an inner conflict. But your subconscious knows and embodies truth despite your attempts to mask it. Is it worth the effort to release painful emotions now? This is what self-mastery is about and discovering the value that is your true self wishing to emerge. Here’s your chance to be your own master. Keys to Self-Mastery These six elements provide a holistic foundation to master the Self: 1. Self-Support: Harnessing Your Inner Resources. When faced with challenges, a strong nervous system and inner support system are essential for self-mastery. Through mindful practices like deep breathing, you can cultivate a calm and focused mind. Doing yoga to allow your energy to be balanced and flow helps the body to break-up inner blocks so you can help yourself. 2. Listen to Your Emotions: Allow emotions to surface and acknowledge them fully. This can help you identify underlying issues and determine next steps. Your emotions can guide you towards release, healing, and transformation. 3. Build Your Support Network: Everyone needs support. Seek guidance from mentors, coaches, friends, or family. Consider joining mastermind groups or social communities for camaraderie and accountability. 4. Commit to Your Practice: Consistent effort, even on challenging days, is key to self-mastery. Your practice should elevate your life, goals, and support systems. Remember, practice is a lifestyle! And don’t forget to celebrate your showing up for yourself, in both big and small ways. 5. Take Action: Action is an important accelerator; it provides impetus for the next step. Fear can often hinder action yet, with the support of your inner and outer tools, your road to self-mastery can begin with that first step. Even small steps can lead to significant progress. 6. Make Time for Gratitude: We all receive gifts along the way– many of them, if you pay attention. Gratitude can enhance patience, compassion, and self-love. Take time each day to appreciate even the mundane aspects of life. The Goal of Self-Mastery Understanding your complete Self, purpose and desires can feel like being a “jack of all trades”. You are a multi-faceted, holistic being that cannot be looked upon as just one singular aspect. Self-mastery involves discovering and embracing all aspects of yourself. The goal of your self-mastery work is to feel safe to be you, to be at peace within, and to live fearlessly in equanimity and bliss. Where are you in your self-mastery journey? What does it look like for you? With grit and grace, Anna P.S. If you would like a launch pad to start moving towards self-mastery, particularly if you are someone who tends to prioritize outer peace over inner peace, comment below or email reply to waitlist for my next 40-day challenge: a set of 4 inward and outward practices to promote peace and mastery. Peace to you on your journey!  Image by MythologyArt from Pixabay Healing implies existing pain or hurt. A journey suggests an arduous, beckoning path of challenge and unknowns. Are you on a healing journey? Is it for you? WHO THIS IS FOR. Anyone taking this road called Life is presented with this path. We are essentially all on it however not all of us are conscious of it. Some may never acknowledge and accept it. Some are thrust into the awareness necessarily— there was no choice but to see and accept it. To heal. To journey. NON-ACCEPTANCE IS A DEFAULT CHOICE. We all experience pain, hardships, existential crises. How you deal with these can vary widely from person to person as well as within one person dealing with work problems vs relationship issues vs self-concept vs everyday matters. Responses to the ‘hard knocks’ come from individual experiences, habit patterns, familial/cultural/societal influences, personal temperament, and even genetic or ancestral traits passed on. It’s what makes us all unique and gives life such a rich tapestry to take in. But encountering and processing pain is given to everyone. Oh joy! The degrees of pain vary widely as well. Pain comes:
We all have some level of all of these. You figure out how to deal with it. You stumble through it, side-stepping, overcompensating, distracting, numbing— or you meet it head on. Time passes and it becomes a memory. Enjoy life as much as possible….until the next turn. I would not have considered much of these experiences as “in need of healing”, just things to work through or get over. It’s just life. Right?
And if you don’t know, now you know.“ - Notorious B.I.G. WHY CHOOSE IT CONSCIOUSLY.
You don’t have to be in rehab or suffering from disease to require a healing journey. When life throws you into such a debilitating, life-changing situation, by default, you end up on such a path. A healing journey. To consciously choose to be on a healing journey without the emergency situation is the way to not only heal and live more fully and freely, but it’s also the way to change the world we live in. Your healing self inspires and uplifts those around you, creating a ripple effect of love and healing in others. And on and on. From a cut on your finger to dealing with everyday struggles like losing weight, challenging conversations, making a tough decision, these are all experiences that present an opportunity to heal. A healing journey dives deeper into the stories that cause stress and confusion in these situations. What is the source of this wound and how do I tend to it? It is NOT checking under the bandage every five minutes.,,, ✔️ It’s bringing awareness to the parts of you that are confused, unsettled, exposed and raw, wounded, in need of care. ✔️ It’s assessing the broken bone, setting the cast, keeping it clean and continuing to live your life while it’s healing. ✔️ It’s checking back periodically, grateful for the opportunity to heal, appreciating life’s miracles, and learning to have grace. Someone questions you or insults you and you respond in shame or with righteous indignation. Something there needs healing. A healed person responds with curiosity, listens and checks in with herself. A healed person responds with respect for all involved. The journey is about progress. An unhealthy response is not reason for shame, blame, or justification. It’s an alert system telling you that healing is required. When you choose to see your life experiences as a healing journey, you are choosing YOU. When you need to heal a deep gash, you give it attention. What about when your wound is internal? Your life deserves that magnanimous attention by YOU. You heal. Your life feels more joyful and abundant. You spread that into the world. It’s that simple. LIFE AS AN ADVENTUROUS HEALING JOURNEY. The best part about seeing life as a healing journey is, once you experience a deep healing, especially when the pain was so entrenched, not only do you feel powerful, you begin to understand what it means for things to be truly possible. For your dreams to be possible. The dance between trial and error, challenge and achievement become a delightful, harmonious movement with interesting subplots, creating a masterful symphony. A fascinating adventure. Life throws curveballs. Rain dampens a long-awaited event, a trusted friend reacts poorly due to their own issues, and even a seemingly joyous occasion sours. Yet, these ups and downs are part of the adventure. With a mind for healing, even the most difficult experiences can transform into chapters filled with wonder, resilience, and growth. Embracing life as an adventurous healing journey is undeniably one of the most powerful ways to heal yourself. A resilient nervous system, fostered through this very journey of healing, becomes foundational for navigating emotional challenges and discovering the hidden gifts within them. It's a practice (which will be explored further in my next post) For now, what do YOU think about choosing to see life as an adventurous healing journey? With grit and grace, Anna SachKiret PS. If you want to choose this healing journey, please comment “my [choose an adjective] healing journey!” –and may you be filled with the healing vibration you need today. Peace! The Stress of Decision Fatigue When it comes to making decisions, big or small, have you ever felt overwhelmed by the number of choices you face daily? Right or left, yes or no, stay or go, act or not. Constantly deciding which path to take can exhaust you without you even realizing it. No wonder you feel depleted at the end of the day! Wouldn’t it be nice to release the weight of deciding for ourselves…. but also still decide for ourselves? Here’s a story that highlights decision-fatigue: I recall my immigrant dad telling me of the day he first walked into a supermarket in America. The sheer volume of cereal options was too much. And then in the next aisle, the numerous choices for a can of beans…..oy! He left without getting his groceries. While it might’ve been less stressful to have one cereal and one can of beans, we do gratefully have and want the options– but this illustrates how overwhelming it can be trying to pick the right ketchup, much less the rest of your day! Moral of the story: we want options, just not the stress of decision-making.  Decision-making, even for mundane matters, can accumulate and cause anxiety and stress. While some choices are easy and instinctive, others will cause minor agony or demand mental effort. Thankfully, there are those moments when you feel confident and content with your decisions. It’s this experience we are striving for to empower confidence and satisfy the soul. So how do we get there? THE YOGA ANSWER We all know that yoga serves to increase flexibility and balance, reduce anxieties, and induce calm. It may seem obvious that deciding from a less anxious, more calm space will help you. But, it’s more than that….. Did you know that yoga can strengthen your mental-emotional health, particularly your decision-making skills? As a lifelong, self-help junkie, yoga was not on my radar as a way to reduce the stress of uncertainty and self-animosity, until way into my adulthood. I discovered this benefit quite by accident – or perhaps it was divine intervention. A few weeks into the practice of kundalini yoga, I was surprised to experience a clarity and lightness that allowed previously-persistent worries and woes to dissipate seemingly overnight. Worrying about all the things that can go wrong makes it really hard to make sensible decisions. Indeed, you heed the fears and decide protectively….often leaving you with a feeling of loss, misalignment, dissatisfaction, and sadness sensing opportunities were missed. Do you know this feeling? So what was this kundalini yoga? How did it make such dramatic changes for me? The Power of Kundalini Energy. Kundalini yoga is known as ‘the yoga of awareness’. The kundalini refers to a latent energy that sits at the base of your spine and represents your unmanifested potential. Through the practice of kundalini yoga, you awaken this energy to coil up your spinal channel, stimulating your body’s main energy centers along the way. These are known as your chakras. Imagine. Your lowly, dormant potential…..suddenly awake with expansive possibility! Like having been imprisoned in a small area, not even realizing there was more out there. Waiting. For you. I believe that we know deep down when we’re being stifled. We have an inner sense that we’re deciding from incomplete information. We hesitate to decide because there’s an inner resistance. Often this happens because we are inadvertently going against the natural rhythms of life and of our own alignment; the modern world doesn’t really support this. We humans are great at disrupting natural rhythms with our mental clutter – manipulations, distortions, and justifications. Technological inventions play a role in this (--and this is not to say we should deny electricity or computers!). We are intelligent and capable of enjoying ‘advancements’ AND being conscious of the impact it has on the natural order…and on us. It’s about balance. This is where tapping into and aligning our energy helps us. It’s the power of our expanded awareness and connection to a divine source.  Your Divine Intuition. Picture the sun, the moon, the stars, the rotation of the planets, nature….a seamless, harmonious flow. It knows what to do, when. And it acts on it. This divine wisdom resides within each of us as well. Raising our kundalini energy and maintaining the practice balances, nourishes, guides and supports our highly-intuitive sense of Self. With this elevated energy, we begin to know what is aligned for us and to trust it. Energy in Thought & Being. We are all energy, even our thoughts. Negative thoughts, toxic stress and paralyzing uncertainty manifest as blocked energy. When we practice yoga, we practice controlling our breath through pranayam (breathing exercises). This practice helps us to be with our thoughts consciously, both on and off the mat. Here’s another image: picture a boulder in a river. A bit of “normal”, stressful thoughts around decisions is like smaller rocks that the water finds its way around and smooths the rocks’ edges as it does. It adds attention, dimension and beauty. This is healthy stress. When the stone is huge and blocks much of the flow, it creates a back-up and effectively stops movement. The energy is pressurized, uncomfortable and overwhelming. This type of stress around decision-making will create blockage and impact your overall health, much less leave you undecided.  Credit Unknown Mindful movement and breathwork creates more room for flow and breaks down what’s no longer serving us.
5 WAYS YOGA MAKES SURE YOU GOT IT RIGHT Circling back to decision-fatigue and my father’s grocery store experience, when I occasionally fall back into that sort of dizzying decision vector, I know to go to my practice. Find a meditation or a kriya that clears the confusion and tames the overwhelm. Here are 5 ways that my yoga practice serves me in making confident, energized decisions:
Yoga opens, nurtures and empowers this elevated level of mental strength, fortitude, and trust to fearlessly decide and know it’s right. I hope this offers you some measure of greater confidence. Decide heartily and wholly and live in your truth– it won’t tire you out! What are you deciding on today? Does your answer come with ease and flow –and from the heart? Divinely yours, Anna SachKiret PS. Is decision-fatigue a thing for you? How do you combat it, if so? If not, what supports your process? Hit "reply" or "comment" below the post-- I'd love to hear from you! “Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift... that is why it is called Present” Master Oogway in Kung Fu Panda We are all blessed with the present, however many of us leave this ongoing gift unopened, missing out on valuable moments in our lives because we don't realize its impact.  Image by Spencer Wing from Pixabay The Presence Present
I admit, I often find myself mired in thought about: projects I’m working on, issues to resolve, how to coordinate my family’s schedules, my to-do list, how to do this or that better, a relationship challenge, and on and on. This is rather normal, of course– who isn’t dealing with these sorts of daily life situations? What isn’t ideal however is when these thoughts cause me to miss out on:
When we live in the present, it simply means we’re not dwelling in the past or living for the future. We are not distracted or sitting in paralysis by past pains and future fears nor dwelling in grief or longing for what was or what could be. We are fully feeling (good or bad) and living IN this very moment. Fully present for our lives. This is the gift. While it’s vital to make space for processing past situations and planning for the future, the balance between these activities and living in presence is often way off-kilter. We rush through our days, either constantly chasing the next thing or paralyzed by indecision. This is because we're not anchored in the present moment. You know that person who constantly checks their phone (-maybe there’s something more interesting calling or happening elsewhere?) and meanwhile misses the sunset, or checks work emails while on vacation and loses the purpose and enjoyment of the trip? How about those times driving from point A to point B and not recalling exactly how you got there? Do you experience this imbalance in your life? If so, how does it manifest, and how can we find the right balance? The Gift of Presence (and its two power partners) To be present, we must feel grounded. When we are grounded, our lives progress with more ease because we can be more aligned and self-aware from this space. When we are not grounded, life becomes complicated, stuck, discouraging as we are preoccupied with the past or future. We become disconnected, scattered, lost in thought, confused, and indecisive. This can lead to overwhelm and a downward spiral of emotions. Our consciousness retreats from the present moment and we go into autopilot. We are no longer rooted in our physical bodies nor aligned with our inner truth, our highest Self. We are out-of-balance and have lost sight of our gift of Presence. We can elevate our ability to Be Present with the help of two power partners. Our Presence serves these partners as well offering us a three-point team to truly live into our gifts. Power Partner #1: Our Practice Our Practice helps us develop our capacity to be more present. How do we get grounded? Strengthening our first chakra, or root chakra (the energy center for safety, security and belonging). How do we clear our negative thought patterns and blocks? Mantras (specific chants or sounds) and breathwork (focused breathing exercises) can be powerful tools. How do we find the energy to help ourselves move through the complications we create? Expand our aura, strengthen circulatory and nervous systems, boost the immune system. When our Practice is established, we give ourselves the support we need to be grounded, in Presence, and in alignment with our true selves. Kundalini yoga offers these supports and is my practice of choice, along with teaching it for mastery. What does your Practice consist of? Power Partner #2: Our Path Our Path clears the way for more Presence. Gaining clarity on your path can help you live a healthy balance between thinking about the future, worrying about the past, and staying present. One of the most effective ways I have found to illuminate my path is tuning-in to my emotions to uncover my blocks and acknowledge my true desires. Especially if you have a tendency for perfectionism, it can feel uplifting to spend a lot of time planning and healing without ever going into action. With the help of Power Partner #1, you can more readily access your emotional guides to release what paralyzes you and heal at the same time. The clearer your Path becomes, the easier it gets to stay Present. Tuning-in to my emotions is a powerful part of my practice to gain clarity and presence. How clear is your Path? Building Your Presence Muscle Take a moment now to reflect on your own Presence:
Your PRESENCE is something that builds like a muscle; your Practice is the gym (or mat), your Path is your goals and motivation . Finding your right balance is supported by this trifecta of powerful partners. How is your Presence? May you accept and open this gift often and receive your many blessings. With grace and gratitude, Anna SachKiret PS. a quick tip for you– include in your practice a midday alarm to check-in on your presence daily. When the alarm rings, take up to 5 minutes to notice your 5 senses, one-by-one. What do you see right at that moment? What do you hear? Smell? Feel by touch? Taste? Take your time with it and savor each sensation. PSS. hit reply and let me know how this landed for you! Do you feel your Presence is working for you?  Photo credit: unknown from Pixabay Remember that spark you had as a young child? The one that made you light up with joy and excitement? The way you expressed yourself so freely? Many of us, myself included, lose that spark somewhere along life’s journey, having replaced it repeatedly with what we deem to be a more socially-accepted way of being. As John Bradshaw, author of "Healing the Shame That Binds You," says: “Something happened…. so that we lost that spontaneity, verve and enthusiasm. Nothing more tragic than to see a child who’s had the life beat out of them…..withdrawn, depressed,…… “.
But what if the spark of that Little You isn't actually gone? What if that part of you is simply stuck under layers of self-preservation, self-doubt and years of practice donning a persona of societal expectations? This is where the journey of self-love begins. Why self-love? Explaining the benefit of self-love is like describing the color blue to a blind person; they won't truly understand until they experience it themselves. Even though I had a good childhood, I struggled with self-esteem, depression and anxiety as a young adult. Through my commitment to my kundalini yoga and meditation practice and emotional healing work, I've experienced a strength and joy within that I never knew existed. A love of Self that can only be experienced. It's time to discover this in you! The Mask of Shame: Why We Dim Our Light Think of the "life beat out of [the child]" metaphor as the separating from your authentic self, or your soul. As a child, your entire expression came from your soul— carefree, alive and in full alignment with yourself. External influences, however well-intentioned, began to chip away at that confidence. You began to change your mind; your emotions alerted you but most of us did not have the wise guidance to understand the whispers of our own emotions. Are you wearing a mask? Here are some signs:
Healthy Shame vs. Toxic Shame: Understanding the Difference It's important to distinguish between healthy shame and toxic shame. Healthy shame is a useful signal telling you you’ve deviated from your best self, prompting you to learn and do better. Toxic shame is the internalization of these messages, essentially convincing us that we are fundamentally flawed for having made mistakes. Instead of course-correction, as healthy shame helps us do, we fall to self-criticism and seek a constant need for validation (people-pleasing). Unmasking and Reconnecting with Your Spark If you recognize yourself here, you’re likely wondering how to get back to your true self. How do I separate what is truly me and what is not? The reality is the lines and truth can get blurred. It’s like the proverbial layers of the onion. The ‘real you’ gets unveiled, one thin layer at a time. The good news is: each layer of healing feels like a mountain of relief. And once you experience this, you will be less afraid and more willing to risk peeling off another layer more often. It empowers you to keep going. Your Authentic Self: Practical Steps
Tools for Self-Love: Here are ways to build your self-love muscle:
This is just the beginning of your journey. A coach or therapist can be a valuable guide, but you have the power to start uncovering your authentic self and shedding the mask of toxic shame. Find your soul’s voice and live from that space. You are worthy of living this life ignited with your true spark! With love and gratitude, Anna SachKiret P.S. Comment "UNMASK" if you recognize you have one. Can you sense that inner spark that's been waiting to be free? Let me know! |
AuthorI am the Essential Soul Mama. I am a mama, a soulful-spiritual teacher, an intentional storyteller, and a lover of stories of all kinds, in all forms. I write about emotions, parenting, natural health options, mind-body-soul connections, and anything that elevates our lives. Archives
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