"Success is liking yourself, liking what you do and liking how you do it". -Maya Angelou For some of us, this comes naturally. For others of us, this is a tall order. It could feel impossible. For all of us, it is not only possible but the whole premise of life. It seems we go through life seeking the holy grail of "success". The truth is, success is subjective. Your idea of success might be to create and build a company, go public, make millions, and be famous. Others find success to be seeing your child graduate high school. And yet others are successful if they can just coax themselves out of bed every day to live a "responsible" life after years of self-medicating with drugs and alcohol. The common link in all of this is coming to a place where you feel you're meeting a meaningful goal; you're accomplishing something that takes inner strength, courage, and great effort. It is also about integrity. Some may accomplish a goal that seemed like "what they wanted" only to be unsatisfied, finding out that it was filled with inner conflict, guilt and/or shame. Integrity is key. These common links basically come down to: liking yourself, liking what you do and liking how you do it.
With that foundational, simple yet profound goal or mantra in mind, make choices in life that help support this measure of success. Use it to discern what matters to you and how you can support yourself to focus on those things. What activities, practices, ideas, beliefs, steps, connections, intakes, and other uses of your time and energy help you live in this success. Yes, LIVE IN IT, not reach for it. The mastery is within your NOW and living with Presence. It will get progressively easier and more automatic with the commitment or it can be a struggle each day until the switch flicks. You may slip back and forth into self-sabotage and self-esteem until its more esteem, less sabotage. This process -- if you can recognize that you are in it -- is part of that success. It is YOU living the journey itself conscientiously that can be liked and loved. What an adventure you are living! Keep going with compassion for yourself. BE in your success. Like yourself for living all your ups and downs. Own it. Feel full within yourself. Be success-full.
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"Your passion is your qualification. It is your leading qualification". -Danielle LaPorte "Desire is transformed into drive when a dream creates a passion for action" -Dr. Robert Anthony And excerpts from GuruMeher Khalsa's book Senses of the Soul: "Desire serves....to take you from needy to fulfilled". -and- "In Desire Consciousness, there is no containment and no contentment; but beneath it all the while is the Soul's Desire for you to experience complete fulfillment". -and- "...to let Desire do its job....Between unbridled expression and stifled suppression lies the ability to clearly discern our real needs". -and- "Desire is a powerful thing..... it is just pure energy that is there to help you get what you need. Where it takes you depends on how you use it". -and, from an interview of GuruMeher sharing his steps to success: "Follow your passion, but find a way to develop self-discipline." Your heart's desire is the call of your Soul to allow you the experience of Wholeness-- "complete fulfillment". We all have needs but only some of us are "needy". Those who escape that label are the ones that know their needs and how to get them met. And that is a matter of discernment and self-discipline. The outline or boundaries you set for yourself is the tool of that discernment and self-discipline. It's the container in which you can powerfully connect with your true desires and needs, as opposed to the free-floating, overwhelming and misguided desires of want want want. Passion is the energy of drive. To act. Upon the discerned Desires. As said by composer Yanni: "All you need is passion. If you have a passion for something, you'll create the talent". Whether you feel you have the talent or not, check in with yourself. Listen in silence, breathe and relax your mind and body, let go..... allow yourself to simply feel without judgment. Your feelings are your Soul's voice. What do you desire? What drives you? You may need to sort through other emotions --Anger, Fear, Guilt, Shame, etc. Your immediate need may be a base need: to feel safe, to survive (think Maslow's hierarchy of needs). Find a way to meet these needs. Create your container, like an imaginary pencil sketch with lines that don't limit you but holds you. Looking at the numerology, this year brings a focus on our personal power ("3" from '21 or 2+1) and our expression ("5" from 2021 or 2+0+2+1). Our personal power has everything to do with our drive, our passion, our action and ability to manifest. Aligned with our Soul's needs to bring us to complete fulfillment, the container of self-discipline helps us channel our efforts to project and express ourselves with passion. With zest! I've been drawn to my Passion essential oil these days, which led to this writing. DoTERRA's Passion includes the oils of cardamom seed, cinnamon bark, ginger root, clove bud, and sandalwood. It's called the Inspiring Blend and includes spiciness, digestive aids, and grounding. A beautiful, uplifting scent to connect with our Soul's Desires. I like to use the handy rollerball version "Passion Touch", before my meditation and throughout the day on my wrists and behind my ears, to spark joy and excitement around all that I do. Live your heart's desire, friends. If you're not there yet, find a way. You are worth it.
A lesson that weaved through my year was about living with embodied beliefs...and where I did and didn't truly embody an idea. It sounds good to be mindful but did I really do that? It's a forced exercise if not coming from deep within. Another major lesson was about the container that holds my ideas-- the healthy boundaries. The year before that was a deep immersion into personal emotions (my soul's voice). Altogether, I start this year in a clay pot of somatic living....listening, connecting and acting upon my Soul's wishes. I call this soulsomatic living. She's been ignored, repressed, denied, overruled by an Ego that thought it knew better, could protect better, and had my best interests at heart. No, that Ego voice was caught up in the noise and was simply louder as I smothered the sounds of inner friendship.
I'm beyond grateful for what the past years have helped me see and super excited for what my Soul intends to show me. So let's go! In grace, grit, compassion and light-- I'm ready for a soulsomatic life. Join me! Responsibility.
Response-ability. Response. Ability. What does responsibility mean to you? What does it mean to be responsible? Does it differ in different areas of your life? I keep pondering the belief --which I hold to be true-- that Freedom and Responsibility are two sides of the same coin. We all want "freedom" - to live it in our nation, to feel it in our own bodies, our own lives. The idea of freedom I will come back to. Today (and onward), I want to embody and embrace Responsibility.....whatever that means....... Let's break it down: My ability to respond is my responsibility. Respond to what? My life and the things that are important to me. Things that are True, that hold Integrity, and that does not harm Others. This sounds as it should be true enough for everyone: Your responsibility is to be able to respond to your life and the things--which are True, hold Integrity, and does not harm Others-- that are important to you. Does that resonate for you? What kinds of things are important to you and fit those guideposts of True, Integrity and Does No Harm? Here are 3 points of focus which can be looked at in the detail of your own life:
To live in balance with keen knowledge of MY needs, within MY means, at any given moment and to be able to respond. Technically, this IS self-care. Self-care, living in my truth, being an example of light and meaningful expression of Truth for my family and community and on......these are the things that are important to me that are True, hold Integrity, and does not harm Others. And my ability to respond to these things, within the protective boundaries of balancing my needs, within my means, at any given moment, is the Truth I need to embrace and embody somatically in every cell of my being. Yet still, this is all well & good but could get overwhelming where you feel you have not learned how to manage, digest, and metabolize these things. The "ability" part of it. How do you respond seemingly without the ability? Recognizing the perceived dis-ability is the first step. Think of those who are considered to have a "disability" as is commonly known in society today. Or a "handicap". Some people need help like handrails, wheelchairs or ramps or special technological advancements to assist in speaking or seeing or some other need. Some secure tutors or nurses or other sorts of caretakers. Whatever the situation, ALL are required to look for ways to see beyond their dis-ability and acknowledge where they just need to work a little harder, where they need help and where they can creatively do things differently to balance ability with dis-ability. What are your perceived dis-abilities and how will you see beyond it? Write it down. Assess it. Do the work. This is your RESPONSE-ABILITY. Each of us are responsible for our own response-ability. Together, as response-able individuals, is how we create our own Freedom and how we can promote freedom in our greater world. Digging deep within is where our Truth lies. And our Truth is worth finding-- it is where our salvation thrives, and freedom and responsibility exist on the same coin. #response-ability #dis-ability #freedom #truth #selfcare #responsibility What's holding you back?
Nothing. Something..... What's holding you back? (Thinking.....close eyes......searching......breathing....... feeling......). Fear. Fear of what? (sigh) Fear of my hopes, of achieving, of being of great service. Fear of not achieving and staying in my cozy shell of "nothing happens". Predictable. Fear of the physical, internal damage that I fear will arise by holding back, holding in. Fear of my voice. Fear of being misunderstood. Fear of being found out, that I am crap, my ideas are crap....I am insignificant. How does that feel in your body? Like a bottle of nerves being shaken, about ready to burst. Like my cells are suffocating. Except when numbed.... Except when a sudden burst of inspiration brings me a high wave of tide until it subsides.....sometimes to a lower plane. Then I feel sunk. Worthless. How do you want to feel-- what is the opposite of that feeling? Calm and rhythmic ebbs and flows with peaks (from the inspiration) and back to equalized. Steady, even through "the negatives". Well-paced. Soothed nerves and self-assuredness and a feeling of command and acceptance. A patient "knowing" and trust in the creative process. I feel strong and courageous. What will it take to get there? Action. Fear subsides when I take action....steps bring me one step closer. Steps of creation and proof that "I can". Steps that inform me of what comes next. Holding the vision in my heart, but don't look too far ahead (which creates the overwhelm I know all too well). But, I've taken many small steps and the Fear remains....... Ok, a little ongoing, bite-sized fear keeps me motivated to do my best, but....... But......? But...... (close eyes, breathe, feel......) it's THE step I need to take that I'm afraid of. Ahhh, now we're getting somewhere........can you define THE step? Ahhh, yes... I can name it and I can start to look at "the why" and "the how" of it. I just needed to see the block to begin to tear it down. And the fear lessens. The unknown becomes known. Ok, I got this. Thank you, Friend Fear. You're welcome. That's what I'm here for. ❤️ #friendfear #emotionalfreedom Where there is darkness, there is also light.
Where there is fear, there is also love. I've heard the encouraging and loving words of parents telling their kids: in the midst of tragedy, look for the people who are helping. In other words, look for the light amidst darkness, the love amidst fear. This idea that there is always love on the other side of fear may not feel clear or even possible when you find yourself feeling fearful. Stressed, anxious, sad, shamed, guilty, angry, scared.....it's all based in fear. (All true and valid emotions, by the way, doing their work to alert you that something is not aligned with you and needs your attention). Whenever I notice -- as soon as I catch myself -- caught up in fear, this is a reminder for me to come to my breath. I have a few go-to breath meditations I like to use but just the very simple: close my eyes and take long deep breaths -is all I truly need. Do this for as long as you need until you feel calm and can respond (as opposed to react) to the fear....and amazingly the Monster Fear becomes a much tamer beast. And in that space, I can look for the Love. To develop the habit of letting fear be a trigger to come to my breath, I made it a conscious daily practice for a number of days in a row to notice the fears popping up in my life-- big and small....there were plenty. The house is a mess and I'm angry at all those who contributed to it. Breathe deeply. My kids are squabbling endlessly over seemingly nothing and I don't know how to get them to stop (I'm irritated). Breathe deeply. The dishes I did not use are piled in the sink (I'm resentful). Breathe deeply. My spouse made a hurtful comment. Breathe deeply. My boss was super-critical of something I put alot of effort into. Breathe deeply. The news is deeply disturbing and threatening my peace of mind. Breathe deeply. I haven't finished my class preparations and I'm running out of time. Breathe deeply. Each of these moments created a fear for me and I practiced noticing them. I would not have considered them fear in the past but noticing them made it possible to look at them differently. When you can make it a regular practice to notice and find your calm through your breath, you develop the ability to do this every time, especially when your fear is maximized. From a calm place, you can then make the choice to see the situations from Love-- which is really the only Truth in life. Fearful, ugly things happen but when you get to the bottom of it, you will find a lack of love that was the cause. So finding the Love is like turning on the light switch. Look for the people helping. Look for your Self helping. Look for the Love. Just stop.
Breathe. Create space by letting your mind release all of it. (Don't worry, you'll bring it back.....the necessary parts). For now, just let go and only focus on your breath. Your breath is everything. Breathe. Now..... bare bones. That's it. Forget all the rest.... all those extra elements that will make your creation outstanding.... for now, it's gravy. Keep the foundation and be sure it's solid. That's it. When you are ready and your friend Overwhelm has said goodbye, smile and embrace those extras one at a time. Don't open the floodgates. Take the time to welcome and connect each new addition to your project. Savor and delight in them. Or thank them for coming and let them go. Sometimes I make the wrong decisions. I know that I am as I'm making it.
What is that?! It's nervous energy. It's fear. It's discomfort. It's knowing what it is and not wanting to face it. Feeling an insurmountable obstacle to tackle. The poor choice didn't seem to have any real ill effects. Except maybe that my day might have looked different if I chose self-love instead of self-sabotage. If I chose the healing meditation that would've set me on course for a better decision. If I reached for my balancing oil and let it work my nervous system to peace. But of course my oil wasn't right next to me. I resisted the meditation (which my oil would've helped release). There's never a wrong move, to be honest. I needed the reminder which this small regret gave me. Today, I hold my oil. Today, I do that kriya. Today, I embrace the meditation. My compassion and love for myself, for my Soul, swells. Sat nam. It’s easy to fall back on what we know, what we grew up with, even when we know what we really want for our children is different. But how has that been working for you? If you feel at peace with the ease of "what you know", then you’re okay. Easy is great when it’s connected to your sense of truth. If you’re suffering inside, then easy will become the messy or traumatic challenges to face later.
Happiness is your natural state". - GuruMeher, in his book Senses of the Soul. I define happiness as a baseline of inner peace. A space where you have total equanimity no matter what the tides bring in. Happiness is not all flowery and giddy smiles and like everything is a party. Sometimes there could be anger and sadness, and still there is happiness. This might be easier to understand in the opposite state: Sometimes on the outside you appear happy-- and might actually be feeling happy in a moment, for instance during a celebration or having met a goal --but inside, you don't actually feel peaceful, you might feel as if you are only projecting a fake happy. How's that? "Happiness is your natural state". Why is this a good mantra? We don't always pay attention to our emotions when they alert us, and emotions are our friends. They are there specifically to guide us, just like our sense of touch guides us away from the hot stove. Repeat the mantra to help you remember: whenever you find yourself in a state of feeling Not Happy, or that state of inner peace is disturbed or not to be found, ask yourself: "What am I feeling?" Knowing that happiness is your natural state, then “not happy” means you have something to check in on. Respect the senses, identify your emotions. They will always lead you toward the right path. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~ A kriya for releasing your emotional patterns and programming: Working on your frontal lobe helps you release stuck negative emotional memory-- or the patterns and programming from your childhood and into adulthood that harden and form your personality. Negative emotions get lodged in the body creating physical pains while the patterns and programming harden in the frontal lobe. Try this kriya below to help relax and loosen that stuck emotional memory. Here’s a great article relating to this: Kundalini Yoga and the Frontal Lobe : Navigating Overwhelming Emotions. |
AuthorI am the Essential Soul Mama. I am a mama, a soulful-spiritual teacher, an intentional storyteller, and a lover of stories of all kinds, in all forms. I write about emotions, parenting, natural health options, mind-body-soul connections, and anything that elevates our lives. Archives
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